Guest Blogger Profile: Simon Daykin

So the big question is “Do you write your own vows?”  Or even “can you?”  I know I was a little scarred when my future wife told me we would be writing our own vows.  But I sat down and wrote what I think were some damn fine vows.  I made people cry so I took that as a good sign.  I do tell my grooms that if at all possible, write your own vows.  You can give her Hallmark cards and stuff written by other people for the rest of your life.  Make the wedding day special, man up and write them vows!

It’s All About Each Other

At Firefly Occasions we work with both the Bride and the Groom to make sure the wedding day is a fusion of both their personalities.  Nothing infuses your wedding like writing your own vows.  You want them to be original, heartfelt and from you.  You don’t even have to memorize them, you get them to your officiant and they will have them with them in case they need to feed you a line or two.  We work with our couples to help them write their vows, separately of course, so the bride doesn’t know what the groom’s vows are and vice versa.

There’s Plenty Of Inspiration Out There

If you’re worried about finding content, DON’T BE!  People have been writing love songs for years, soap operas have been televising weddings since what feels like the dawn of time and even with reality shows like Nick and Jessica and Dave and Carmen have cropped up in the past few years.  Now I’m not saying lift stuff word for word.  I’m saying take a little from column A, a little from song B and mash it all together adding your own feel to it.  Most people in the audience won’t have a clue you lifted a line from a Sade song, and if they do…so what?

Your wedding vow goal: make a grown man cry

Not A Dry Eye In The Place

Nothing gets people going like a good set of vows.  Your family members and audience will be bawling like a child with a skinned knee.  I have seen this countless times.  A big, burly groom gets up there and all of a sudden these beautiful words spill from his mouth and all of a sudden, the entire audience is in tears.  It gets people talking about how cool it was they didn’t have to listen to “til death do us part, for richer and poorer…blah, blah, blah”.  Seriously, I hate to say it but I tend to tune out during the pre-written, used every day vows.  They are boring, I’m sorry but they are.

Simon’s Gutsy Groom Advice

If you can write your own vows, and if you think you can’t, step up and remember you love this women enough to buy dinner for 150 people so get to it and write them anyway.  This is your wedding day, you can’t use other peoples words to tell her how much you love her, it works fine for birthdays and Christmas and that stuff, but for this one day, YOUR DAY…tell her how much you love her in YOUR words.

It’s not that tough, as I said, there is inspiration all over the place.  I had a groom use some lines from Star Wars.  Myself, I used a few lines from different songs and a few odd lines from some films I like.  Plus if you’ve hired us, we’ll work with you one on one to get the best vows you can possibly have.  You don’t need to be Shakespeare, if I can do it, I’m sure you can.

Just remember to work “I Do” or something along those lines into the vows…

Gretchen, from MyWedding.com is here with the SAS (short and sweet) tip of the week for the grooms out there.

Amidst the wedding planning, you may have forgotten to set aside some time to prepare a toast to your groom’s toast to the bride.

Cheers!

Don’t fret, “The Complete Book of Wedding Toasts” by John William McClusky is a great resource for you to use.  Here are a few toasts from the book that I thought were short and sweet:

“Because I love you, I want to walk with you for the rest of my life, hand in hand, through the years to come.  here’s to our future.”

“Here’s to the love of my life, the light of my eyes, the darling of my heart.  In this day of days, I honor you.”

“You make me so much happier than I thought I could ever be.”  I want the joy that we feel right now to last forever.  Here’s to you, my sweet.”

If you have stage fright, just turn to look directly at your bride.  Try to picture just the two of you there and simply say what you feel in your heart.  I know…a bit cheesy…but so worth it!

Cheers!

Gretchen Viles of MyWedding.com is a weekly guest contributor to the GroomsAdvice blog. She specializes in blogging about groom’s issues from a bride’s perspective. Founded in 2002, MyWedding.com has grown into one of the most comprehensive easy-to-use local wedding guides on the Internet. They recently launched a wedding ideas and trends content section that focuses on all aspects of wedding planning.

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