By Guest Blogger Madman of The Groom Says

The third trimester can be draining on both your body and your emotions. You may be overcome with a sense of ‘Let’s get this over with already.’ Try to maintain a positive outlook on what you’ve already accomplished and what lies ahead. If you’re just entering the final stretch, here’s what to expect:

YOUR BODY

Aside from general discomfort, third trimester wedding symptoms include:

* Bloating
* Shortness of breath – You may occasionally feel winded or smothered. These feelings are all too common. Use strategically placed cold compresses and horse tranquilizers to reduce the pressure.
* Vivid dreams/sleepless nights
* Weight gain – By the big day, you may weigh 3 or 4 kilograms more than did when this all began. This is due to a shift in priorities, i.e. hours once spent on the treadmill will now be spent assembling song lists and confirming stuff.
* Continued breast growth

[editor's note - during the third trimester, you should look something like this]

YOUR EMOTIONS

Fears about the big day may haunt you in your third trimester. “How long will it last?” “Who will be there?” “What if I forget something?” Remind yourself that you can only do your best and no more.

The reality of marriage may begin to sink in as well, especially if this is your first. Try to:

* think happy thoughts.
* express yourself in a journal or blog.
* debate circumcision.

YOUR BIG MOMENT

If you have specific preferences for the big day — such as doing it in water — you may need to plan accordingly.

As the date approaches, keep asking the important questions: Can I get tanked the night before? Why the hell did we decide to go through with this in the first place? When is the best time for an epidural?

And most importantly, in the heat of the moment, try not to resent or blame your significant other. They love you dearly, and that’s why they’ve done this to you. Hold their hand through the whole process, and give them gentle squeezes whenever it becomes “too much.” Once it’s over, you won’t even remember the last 9 months. Cause you’ll probably be drunk.

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The Groom Says is a real groom’s blog that details a year of wedding planning from the guy’s perspective. Check it out for daily posts and inspiration from Brian (aka Madman) as he plans his October 2010 wedding. You can also follow The Groom Says on Twitter. DO IT NOW!

I was talking with my buddy Dave from Temple of Groom the other day about his upcoming wedding. He seemed exhausted and mentioned how stressful the last few months of wedding planning had been for him and his fiance. This is not a huge surprise as most of you know how much of a drain the last few months before the wedding can be. He made the comment that the stress was going to drive him to alcoholism or worse. I thought he was kidding and then I saw that crazy look in his eye. This dude was serious!

The conversation got me to thinking. Can you rank wedding planning stress levels through which vice the stress is driving you to? In national security terms, what would a code red be?

Here’s my attempt along with a few tips on coping with stress:

Code Can I get a Light?

Sample stress – The venue we want for the reception was just booked yesterday.

Stress can cause former smokers to pick up the habit again. And once you pick that up it’s quite hard to drop it. If you feel like this could be you, do yourself a favor and pick up one of those fancy electronic cigarettes.

Code Man v. Food

Sample stress – You’ve found the one date that works for you, your bride and your families when you discover that your best friend has scheduled his wedding for the same day.

Food is comforting. Hence the phrase ‘comfort food.’ However, high stress levels can often drive you to binge on unhealthy foods – and we don’t need Morgan Spurlock here to remind us that fast food is killing us one Value Meal at a time. One suggestion is to schedule a once-per-week date night with your fiance where you cook a homemade, healthy meal that’s not going to pile on the pounds before the big day.

Code Scotch

Sample stress – Three months out from the wedding, your honeymoon resort informs you that due to a computer error, your reservation has been canceled and you’re now on a “waiting list” for a room.

I love scotch. Scotchy Scotch. Scotch. Here it goes, down into my belly. Whether it’s scotch, or the liquor of your choice, a nice, stiff drink can taste so good after a hard day at work. But I don’t have to be a rocket scientist to tell you that one of the leading causes of alcoholism is stress. I actually do recommend drinking in moderation while planning the wedding (it’ll help you be more creative), just don’t let booze be a crutch that gets you through the process.

Code Double Down

Sample stress – The Best Man hasn’t been measured for his tux yet and the cut-off date just passed yesterday. It’s 50/50 whether he’ll be able to find an alternate tux elsewhere.

I just returned from a trip to Vegas and as always saw some sad characters at the blackjack table. I always ask myself what could be driving these people to gamble their life away. Is it that hard to turn and face your problems head on?  When planning a wedding, always keep in mind that this is the happiest time of your life. Stress is part of it, but you can’t let it beat you. Face it, accept it and move on. So what if your Best Man’s tux is going to be a shade darker than yours… it could be A LOT worse. You could be the guy at the blackjack table.

Code Green

Sample stress – Your caterer informs you three days before the wedding that they’re going out of business. You won’t be getting your deposit back.

Yes, I’ve actually heard of couples toking it up to cope with the stresses of wedding planning. I myself don’t partake in the giggle smoke, but from what I understand it can be quite relaxing. However, I just can’t quite wrap my mine around experimenting with it while planning your wedding – that’s what college was for.

Code Gibson

Sample stress – You wake up on the wedding day to discover a note from your bride telling you she’s run away with her ex.

I’m not going to comment much on what specifically comes after ‘Code Gibson.’ I’ll just say that I hope you’ve got a good lawyer.

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Disclosure – With two weeks before the wedding, Temple of Groom Dave is not an alcoholic or drug addict, nor is he broke from gambling away his life savings…. yet.

What code are you on? Have you turned from an occasional drinker into a binge drinker? Have you become a full fledged drug addict? Let us know in the comments section below.

Today, we launch a three-part guest blog series from Ben the Groom on being a better fiance.

Playing the role as the supportive fiance is a never ending battle.  There is a fine line between doing nothing, making your bride think you’re apathetic, and being too involved, driving her crazy with questions about the budget. As I posted on my blog before, it’s not about how much you’re involved, it’s about how you’re involved. and there are plenty of ways to make life easier on yourself!

Ben says food, especially french toast, can make any wedding planning activity run smoother

STEP 1: Find ways to incorporate food into the any wedding planning activity.  For example, last night my fiancé told me that we need to make a checklist for the next two weeks.  Because it was late and we were both hungry, I knew that just sitting there, hovering over the same list of to-do’s, we were bound for trouble.  The solution? A quick meal of French toast to supplement our work. Within minutes, she was busy reviewing the list while I was making dinner, listening to her suggestions.

Remember though, you’re not making dinner instead of working with her, you’re making dinner while working. This same philosophy can be applied to almost any activity.  If she asks you to register at Bed-Bath-Beyond on a busy Thursday night, suggest you stop at Cracker Barrel afterwards to review your selections. Before you know it, you’ll be knee-deep in a Country Morning Breakfast for dinner, and she’s getting plenty of time to soak in the registry list you just created.

Next time your fiance asks you to help her complete a job think to yourself, how can food make this better?

Read more from Ben the Groom on his blog.

Guest Blogger Profile: Simon Daykin

Stress can be killer in the weeks and days leading up to the wedding

This week I am “unplugged” and am chilling out.  I find this to be a very important part of life.  Stress levels rise, tempers flare and that interferes with work, everyday life and yes, even wedding planning.  Europe seems to agree with me as they give a standard 4 weeks of paid vacation time.  North America however sits at the lowest amount of vacation time in the “civilized” world…no wonder we’re all going slowly nuts!  Getting away doesn’t mean you have to take a big trip, just get away from the everyday, leave the cellphone and the laptop at home and just bugger off and relax.  Hey, you can even take your fiancé if you like.

But Honey…Johnny Depp Has One!

Ah the private island, the ultimate getaway, even movie stars know the importance of getting away…they have more cash so they can actually buy an island to take off to.  Not something we can do, but it’s nice to dream right?  My point is, these people may only work 4 months of the year, 8 tops (Some “stars” don’t even seem to work, if eating lunch at The Ivy & partying the night away is work, I’m still waiting for my paycheck)  But once the work is done, they take off and chill out to recharge their batteries and get ready for the next film or whatever they have going on.  So you can’t buy your own island, no worries there are plenty out there for you.  Take a week, or even a 3 or 4 day weekend and head off to an island of your choice.  Unplug, relax and get your head back on straight so you can come back all ready to go ahead with the planning of your wedding, remember…the planning is supposed to be fun.

Cabin Fever

When I lived in Toronto we used to head up to Muskoka almost every weekend, fondly named “cottage country” by the locals this was a great place to unwind after a week at work.  It was a 3 hour drive from my place so it wasn’t that bad of a commute.  I loved it because we didn’t have a computer, there was no phone and you didn’t have to drive anywhere so that was great (nudge, nudge, wink, wink).  The atmosphere was super chill, cause…well it’s a cottage and sitting in the sun or early morning fishing made you forget all the troubles and emails at the office.  What I’m saying is this, you don’t have to take off for a week to a deserted island, you can make a quick trip out of the city to get your peace and quiet.

Grab Your Time Whenever Possible

It’s important to take your time wherever you can.  If hanging out with the boys relaxes you, head to the pub and catch the UFC fight.  It happens once a month and it won’t cost you an arm and a leg.  I find sitting in the tattoo chair relaxing, yes I know it’s a cliché but it honestly relaxes me.  Go to the spa for a couples massage or just go out for the day and top it off with a nice dinner.  Just don’t talk about the wedding or work or anything that stresses you out.  I know guys who love to fish, so once a week, off they go.  Golfing as well, unless you play like me then it has the opposite effect.  Even getting out with the guys and hittin’ a few balls at the range can take the edge off.  Feel free to vent a bit but don’t go overboard and raise that stress level…

Simon’s Gutsy Groom Advice

Stress is a killer for grooms, countless studies have proven this, plus it messes with your hair line and that’s no good either.  With work, bills, everyday life, hell…even the commute to work can be a pig and now you have to listen to your bride drone on about the wedding your nerves may start to feel like frayed electrical cables.  It’s important to get away, switch off the brain and get back to your ice cave and penguins happy place.

You don’t have to spend a ton of cash, save that for the honeymoon.  If it’s in the budget to head off to Mexico for the weekend then great, but if it’s not just decide what chills you out and book it into your schedule.  I recommend securing the time in your calendar so no one books something else for you in that time, there’s nothing worse than booking a tee time and then finding out your fiancé wants you to go meet with the florist.

In the past I have just waited till my wife has gone to bed, poured myself a nice drink and sat in the dark and watched a movie I wanted to watch…just remember to keep the sound down so you don’t wake her up.  We all get stressed, the trick is knowing how to control it…and knowing is half the battle.

By Guest Blogger MyWedding.com

Feeling a little stressed from all the wedding planning?  Here are 10 simple solutions to help with that stress-level.

- Have glass of red wine: Just one…maybe two.  But, let’s try to keep it at that.

Gretchen suggests wine, but beer has been known to work as well.

- Jog it off: A brisk walk or jog will assist with blood circulation and breathing, which will literally help you with rising stress-levels.

- Read a book: Ok, well…check out a magazine then – a “man-mag.”  I know, I know…it’ll be hard to stay away from your favorite bridal publication, but, please – resist the temptation.  Or else this stress-reliever will fail.

- Go for a drive:  You don’t need to make it to an actual destination.  There’s just something so relaxing and exciting about heading somewhere but going nowhere.  (Just be sure to call the Fiancée, and assure her you’re not “leaving”…you’ll be back for dinner!)

- Call up an old friend:  From “Twittering” to “Status Updates” on Facebook to text messaging – cell phones aren’t even used for talking anymore.  I say, use up some of those daytime minutes to call up a friend.  Who knows, this may lead to actually hanging out again! This leads me too…

- Hang out with the buddies: Get together with some friends for some male bonding.  “Non-bachelor party” type events are preferable.  How about bowling, or fishing or golf – friendly competition is always healthy and fun.

- Send your Mother some flowers:  Surprising mom with flowers can easily brighten not only her day, but yours!

- Volunteer: Doing something nice for someone always helps take the focus off of ‘your worlds’ stresses.

- Take a nap:   If you can’t afford a 1 hour nap – sometimes, all it takes is a little shut-eye to get your enthusiasm level back up, and your jitters down.

- Ask the Fiancée out on a date:  Who says romance has to end when the wedding planning begins?  It most certainly does not.  Watch a movie, have a nice dinner – reconnect and revive the love.