Posts Tagged ‘Money and Marriage’

Groom’s Book Club: Second Thoughts on Marriage & Divorce

Wednesday, April 6th, 2011

You probably don’t need to be reminded that financial issues are the #1 cause cause of divorce in this country. In a perfect world, money arguments would be left to the bankers and stock traders. Unfortunately, many married couples just can’t seem to agree on finances.  Whether it’s one spouse spending money behind the others back or the other racking up credit card debt, marriage often leads to fiscal disagreement between husband and wife. Personally, I’ve found that my friends who actively researched money matters BEFORE their wedding seem to argue less. My theory has always been that having a strong core understand of money directly leads to a happier marriage. My thoughts were confirmed when I recently picked up a copy of Charles Jackson’s ‘Second Thoughts on Marriage & Divorce.’

newlyweds money

Charles Jackon, is a veteran of two marriages (and divorces). During his experiences, he has met and dealt with attorneys and counselors as well as countless other couples going through similar ordeals. After realizing that much of the emotional and financial stress involved with marriage and divorce was avoidable, he made it his goal to help couples identify and accept financial issues they may face while contemplating marriage or divorce. Charles firmly believes that by being aware of these issues early in the wedding planning/decision making process, will allow you to make better decisions on the issues you may face.

Here are just a few of the topics covered in this resourceful guide

A Guide to Understanding the Laws Surrounding Marriage Licenses – Charles explains the process of obtaining a valid state marriage license, hiring an officiant to marry you and understanding/complying with the laws in your state.

How to Identify and Protect Your Separate Assets – You might not know it, but any assets that you own before getting married will legally always be yours. In this portion of the book, Charles provides a guide on the pros/cons of combing assets and how to identify what’s “yours” and what’s “ours.”

Do Prenuptial Agreements Really Work – You probably don’t need to be told what a prenup is. The larger questions that many couples seek help with are “Do I need one?” and “Do they work?”  There are several benefits (and several disadvantages) of signing a one. Charles walks you through all of them.

Sharing More Than Just Last Names – Do you collect classic cars? Do you have multiple, large investments in your name? The book will tell you how marriage affects these assets and what you can do to protect yourself if you fear divorce may be on the horizon.

And although we hope this doesn’t apply to anyone reading this blog, the book also covers a wide range of topics related to the divorce process. Not only does Charles get into the legal and personal issues involved with ending a marriage, he also provides thought on reasons to stay married. Acknowledging that every marriage faces challenges, he provides valuable insight on why jumping the gun on a divorce may not be the best call. If you happen to know anyone currently going through a divorce, I can vouch that this book would be a great resource for them.

second thoughts on marriage and divorce

Click to order 'Second Thoughts on Marriage & Divorce'

Like what you see? You can purchase the book for $15 off retail here. You can also connect further with Charles Jackson via Twitter, Facebook and Youtube.

second thoughts on marriage & divorce is a sponsor of the man registry’s groomsadvice blog

Have you and your bride-to-be discussed finances? Do you plan on combining assets or keeping them separate? Are you considering a prenup? Tell us your story in the comments section below.

Wedding Budget Saving Idea: Skip the Bubbly

Sunday, May 16th, 2010

wedding champagne bubbly

By Guest Blogger OneWed.com

The champagne toast, a must have of every wedding, right? Um, why? How many times have you been handed a glass of champagne for the toast, taken a sip and then put it back down to go back to your drink of choice?

Unless you or your bride really likes champagne, why not skip it and let guests toast with whatever glass they’re holding in their hand? You’ll save time since the waiters won’t be trying to get everyone a glass in time, and you’ll save money. Money that can be spent on something you really like, such as a good glass of bourbon!

OneWed’s Local Flavor: Off-the-Chart and Off-the-Hook

Monday, November 2nd, 2009

Guest Blogger Profile: Jennifer Napier of OneWed.com

OneWed's Off-the-chart wedding giveaway will help you save some cash.

OneWed.com's Off-The-Chart wedding giveaway will help you save some cash.

Have you seen it yet? The pie chart or bar graph your fiancée found on a wedding site? It’s supposed to show you what percentage of your wedding budget will go for what items. Here’s the dirty insider’s secret, it leaves things out!

That’s why OneWed is offering an amazing Off-the-Chart Wedding Giveaway. We’ll give you and your wedding party all those extras that aren’t on that chart. How many extras? How about $15,000 worth?

For all the details, including how to enter our free wedding giveaway, come and visit OneWed.com.

Don’t Let That (still) Slumping Economy Hurt Your Wedding Plans

Wednesday, October 21st, 2009

Guest Blogger Profile: Simon Daykin

All signs are currently pointing to a major economic turnaround in 2010. However, that doesn’t mean that most Americans still aren’t feeling the crunch. This “crunch” hurts even more if you happen to be a bride or groom planning a wedding.

Tips on how to recession-proof your wedding.

A rough economy doesn't have to ruin your dream wedding.

Here are four ways you can ease a little of the financial pain and still have your dream wedding.

Recession Proof Your Wedding – A lot of brides and grooms go deeply into debt for their weddings. Right now with the markets being the way that they are, that’s a little more than scary. But I’d say don’t be afraid of making some credit card purchases for your wedding but definitely stay in control. I would not advise you to take a line of credit out against your house to pay for your wedding right now. The best way to recession proof your wedding is to figure out what you can realistically spend on your wedding (chat with your parents about this too) and then stick to it. Cut down your guest list rather than trying to penny pinch to fit in your entire office floor. A smaller guest list will give you more room to make your wedding look lavish

Watch Out For the Quick Buck Vendors – Yes you want a good deal but now is not the time to be booking with anyone who hangs up a sign. You need to pick quality wedding vendors who are well established and have financially secure companies that have been around for awhile. How horrible would it be to give someone a big deposit and then not be able to get a hold of them again? I’ve seen this happen even when times aren’t tough but with people trying to make the quick buck right now you need to be extra careful.

Be Smart With Your Wedding AND Lifestyle Budget – It’s important that you make a budget for both your wedding AND your life and then stick to it. This will help you feel in control and confident with all your decisions. My downloadable templates in my product “Let’s Start Planning Your Guest List, Budget and Your Wedding Details” can really help you stay on stop of budgeting.

Be Resourceful and “Resourcefilled”- While you want to be resourceful and find great deals you also want to be resourcefilled. That means you have a bunch of resources to pull from that will help you achieve your ultimate wedding look. A wedding planner like me can really help you with this because I know great vendors to work with and I also have great resources for frugal items and sometimes even vendor discounts. Although hiring a wedding planner can take some room in your budget in the long run a wedding planner can really save you time and money. Click here to schedule an appointment.

Excuse Me, Is This Bar Open?

Tuesday, October 6th, 2009

Guest Blogger Profile: Simon Daykin

I will never forget this day.  We are in Ireland for a wedding, my wife walks up to the bar and asks the barman if the bar is “open”.  Of course thinking, it’s a wedding, it must be free drinks.  And hey, we’re in bloody Ireland right?  Well, this little Irish fella turns to my wife, a mildly puzzled look on his face and says “Of course the bar is open my dear.”  So we order a couple pints and turn to leave…where upon he exclaims…”That’ll be 10 pounds  50 please.”  The bar was technically “open” but it meant something different in Ireland.

Everyone loves an open bar, but there are plenty of other options for the bride and groom.

Everyone loves an open bar, but there are plenty of other options for the bride and groom.

Decisions, Decisions, Decisions

There are many choices of what type of bar you can have at your wedding, the open or free bar, the loony or toony bar, or the regular full price bar.  All of these could be paired with complimentary wine and champagne or just an open cocktail hour.  It’s really up to your wedding planning plans, your bride, the budget and what is important to you.  If you really want an open bar, maybe you have to reallocate some of the wedding budget from elsewhere.

Yes, This Bar Is Open

If you choose to go with the open bar, you want to know what you as the host will be paying for each drink.  Because someone has to pay.  Check if you can bring in your own supply of liquor and then check what the corkage fee will be per person.  Make sure the barkeep only opens bottles on a need to basis, that way you could return any unused bottles after the wedding.  But in truth you know you’ll just be taking it home.  To cut down on costs, have the staff serve wine at dinner instead of just putting bottles on the table.  I would also suggest closing the bars during dinner and speeches so people stay in their seats.  If a guest wants a drink from the bar this time…beer or spirits not usually served during dinner then have one of the wait staff fetch it for them.

Spare Change Anyone?

Loony and Toony bars are quite popular.  This will offset the cost to you on the liquor bill.  I have clients who are having a loony bar at their wedding, but have decided to donate all cash made via the bar to their favorite charity.  This is a great idea also.  It’s always nice to give back whenever possible.  It’s not too much to ask your guests to pony up a buck or two for a drink.  If you decide to do this you can always offer a free signature drink for the cocktail hour, complimentary wine with dinner and champagne for the speeches.  Also, I have found if you charge for the drinks, it cuts done on the one sip and left on the table problems.  And people seem not to go overboard if they have to pay for a drink.  But really?  A dollar or two ain’t that much to ask.

Just A Regular Bar With Regular Prices

You may decide to go with a regular bar and regular prices.  There may be numerous reasons for this.  Your guests may not be big drinkers and alcohol isn’t that important.  I attended a wedding for a couple in recovery, so most people were on the pop and coffee.  The few people drinking of course knew this so it wasn’t a big deal.  It really comes down to what is important to you and your budget.  If you have drinkers in the crowd but can’t do an open or discounted bar, offer other choices.  A complimentary signature drink or glass of champagne upon arrival is great.  Free wine at dinner is good, but have the wait staff serve it so your guests don’t pound through the bottles.  Offer complimentary juice, pop, sparkling water, coffees and tea.  You could also offer a free “special” coffee menu for after dinner or a port with dessert.  This will cut down the overall bar cost but the guests will also feel well taken care of.

Simon’s Gutsy Groom Advice

There are many ways to regulate drink consumption at a wedding so don’t be afraid to get creative.  I would always suggest shutting down the bars during dinner and if not that…for sure during speeches.  It’s hard enough to speak in front of a large crowd without people constantly getting up and distracting you.

Don’t be afraid of what other people think, you don’t want to go into debt just so you can have an open bar at your wedding.  If it’s really important to you that the booze be flowin’ have a look at your budget and see where you can get the money from.  A planner comes in really handy to help re-allocate funds.

Signature drinks are great, you know what’s in them, you know how much alcohol you need to make them and when they’re gone, they’re gone.  You can have lots of fun experimenting with recipes to come up with the perfect one for you and your bride.  I was re-watching Casino Royale last week. During the poker game, Bond orders a martini, which he later christens “The Vesper” and it’s a damn fine drink.  Thought I’d leave you the recipe to start you off.

Bond's signature drink is the Vesper Martini

Bond's signature drink is the Vesper Martini

Vesper Martini Recipe

Ingredients (brands listed are my personal fav’s)

* 6 Parts Gordon’s Gin
* 2 Parts Smirnoff Vodka
* 1 Part Lillet blanc
* Lemon Twist

Mixing Instructions
Shake gin, vodka and Lillet with ice and strain into a chilled martini glass. Garnish with lemon twist.

Enjoy!!!!

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