Whether it’s for Christmas or the honeymoon, the gift of lingerie is sure to please your fiancée. The problem is, most men don’t have the first clue on how to buy it. And the ones who do sometimes can’t conquer the anxiety that goes along with a lingerie shopping expedition. We hope the following guide will help alleviate some of these issues.

Look familiar?

By Elizabeth Tigar, Special to GroomsAdvice from Shop-Underwear

Let’s be honest—gifting lingerie is like getting two for one. It’s a present for her; and, because you’ll also be enjoying how fabulous your lady looks in it, it’s a treat for you too. After all, lingerie is just about the most feminine item a woman can own. But therein lies the problem: whether they’re embarrassed about wandering around a women’s lingerie shop alone, or just plain clueless about ladies underwear, many men have a serious lingerie-shopping phobia.

It’s true, walking into a women’s lingerie store can be an intimidating thing for guys. Those who’ve been too wary in the past should try baby steps like seeking out a smaller boutique lingerie shop. You’re less likely to be overwhelmed by the amount of choices, and you’re more likely to find a salesperson who can give you a little help.

For all the guys out there holiday shopping for your significant others, here are some helpful hints to overcome lingerie-buying anxiety:

1. Come prepared. Before you venture out to buy her lingerie—or anything that comes with a size—you should know what size she is. All this takes is a bit of detective work. Sneak a peek in her underwear drawer (or maybe just at the tag on the bra that’s still on your floor), and note what sizes you see. Bras have a cup (A, B, C, D etc.) and a band size (32, 34, 36). Panties generally come in small, medium or large. Take note of both and bring them with you when you decide to shop.

2. Ask for help. I know this goes against everything a man stands for, but lingerie sales professionals will always know more about the merchandise than you do. So just ask! Mention you’re shopping for a gift and tell them her size.They should be able to guide you in the right direction.

3. Keep it mild. This especially applies for the first-time undergarment gift. DO NOT, under any circumstances, go too sexy with the first undergarment gift. Translation: nothing too see-through (lace is a yes, mesh is a no), nothing too itty-bitty (save g-strings for later) and certainly nothing edible (do we need to say that?), and absolutely, no exceptions, never ever anything without a crotch. Even if sexy is her thing, you risk turning her WAY off with your gift if it’s too risqué, which is exactly the opposite of what you’re going for. Stick to something more tame. A great bra and panty set that she could wear for something other than a special occasion. Maybe even something like a cute nightie. Not the granny kind, mind you—the flirty short kind. This will show her that you’re interested in making her feel pretty and comfortable, not necessarily just seeing her dressed up all racy for you.

Sidenote, When it’s okay to push the envelope: Definitely wait until you’re committed to one another. Critiques on undergarments from someone you’re just dating will get you kicked to the curb fast. Stepping up the game by giving her something sexy is something that can be a welcome surprise. Just make sure you present it with the attitude of “I think you’re amazing and sexy, and I thought this would make you feel exactly like that. But if you don’t like it, that’s okay.” And never with the attitude of “I’m totally sick of your basic cotton undies.” Be tasteful, be respectful. She’ll love you for the gesture all the same.

4. Gift it privately. Lingerie is not a gift you want to see her open in the middle of a restaurant, even a small romantic one. Give her the gift in the privacy of your home, or hers. It’s more comfortable for everyone involved.

5. Don’t be discouraged. Worst case scenario: it’s not her thing. Don’t beat yourself up too much or give up on the idea entirely. If you can tell she doesn’t like it, or if you never see her put it on, ask her gently what she didn’t love about it. Ask her what she likes and take notes for next time.

Following that plan, there’s a decent chance you’ll hit a home run, if not the first time, then maybe the second. Regardless of whether it’s perfect, it’s always the thought—and not the thong—that counts.

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Elizabeth Tigar is the owner of Austin, TX, lingerie boutique Underwear. Visit www.shop-underwear.com to check out the latest styles.

this week’s wedding babe q/a offers an evaluation of a common honeymoon planning question: whether or not to choose a cruise or an all-inclusive resort.

Is a honeymoon cruise right for you?

Q – My fiancée wants to go on a cruise for our honeymoon, but I get sea sick and don’t want to be stuck on a boat for a week. What should I do?

If sea sickness is your primary concern with taking a cruise, there are some preventative measures you can take, in the form of over-the-counter armbands, patches and pills designed to prevent motion sickness. Ask your local pharmacist or doctor for some recommendations. Oftentimes, one of these solutions will allow you to enjoy the cruise without any problems. (I actually suffer from motion sickness on airplanes and cruise ships and do very well when I take over-the-counter medication to prevent it.)

However, if those remedies don’t work for you, or your motion sickness is severe, it sounds like a cruise may not be the right trip for you. And no one wants to feel miserable on their honeymoon.

If your fiancée loves cruises to tropical locales, I’d recommend checking into all-inclusive resorts in your destination of choice instead. In my opinion, these resorts are often like cruises on dry land. Although you’ll be stationed in one island or country (instead of potentially seeing several islands or countries on a cruise), you’ll have plenty of time to explore the resort and the surrounding region beyond during your stay. All-inclusives offer many of the same perks as cruises, such as luxury accommodations, a variety of gourmet dining options, services and activities, all for one flat, per-person rate. And like with cruises, you can make your trip as active or relaxing as you want, by hanging out on the beach or by the pool all day or venturing out on shopping trips, boat rides, hiking trips and helicopter tours at your leisure.

All-inclusives may also save you money, in some cases. For example, alcoholic beverages are often included in the per-person cost of the stay (which isn’t typically the case with cruises). And we all know how quickly a liquor bill can rack up on vacation. Activities such as golfing, bicycle rental and snorkeling, which you’d pay for separately on other trips, are also often included. You’ll likely also spend less by dining on property and enjoying its entertainment options, rather than securing transportation and seeking out meals and entertainment elsewhere. Sometimes, staying around the resort may also be one of the safest options, depending on the current situation in your destination.

Whatever you decide, make sure that the trip is something you’re both excited about and can enjoy together. Remember: Wherever you go (or how you get there) isn’t as important as being together to celebrate your new marriage. Have a great honeymoon!

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Each week,  The Wedding Babe answers a reader question. If you’d like to submit one for consideration, click here.

Where are you heading for your honeymoon? Tell us how you made your choice in the comments section below.

nicki peterson from alta vista vacations drops by the blog today to spread the good word on properly planning the honeymoon. this ain’t the time to cut corners, fellas.

If you want those karmic brownie points (or more immediate rewards) for really knocking her socks off with your trip planning, it’s all about the secret surprises.  I addressed this to honeymooners but whether you’re taking her somewhere special to propose, planning your honeymoon, or heading for an anniversary vacation; it doesn’t matter.  You want to show her how much you care.

Here’s what you need to consider if you really want to wow her:

It’s all about the details
It goes beyond picking the five-star property and getting the limo.  Are those things great?  Duh – of course they are!  But how about stocking that limo with her favorite beer – maybe she doesn’t like champagne!

Match the destination to her interests
Take a look at what you know about her already.  If she loves to mountain bike, maybe you should plan your honeymoon somewhere like St. Lucia – they have great off-road trails – and not the Riviera Maya.  (They don’t let you ride up the sides of Chitzen Itza.)

Match the activities to her personality
Candlelight dinner-for-two on the beach – love it!  But she’s a morning person – how about a private sunrise champagne breakfast on the beach/deck/pier?

Decide what’s most important
Maybe she’s a “Bachelor” fan and yearns for one of the hillside suites with the fourth side open to the world.   Forget the spa treatments if you must, and spring for the room!  (“The Bachelor” was filmed in St. Lucia, just so you know!)

Get professional help

No, not the shrink type of help!  As well intentioned as you may be, you may not be aware of all the options that are available to you.  That’s where a great professional travel planner can really make a difference.  Tell them what you are hoping for and give them the freedom to suggest their own ideas.  You’ll be amazed with what they can arrange for you!

I hope you’re thinking “why settle for Great, Amazing is definitely the way to go”.  You only get one honeymoon, make is as special as she is!  Show her you know her – that’s how you’ll earn your brownie points!

Book your trip before May 31st and I can offer you a free room upgrade at select El Dorado properties in the Riviera Maya. Click here for details.

About Nicki Peterson

I am the proud owner of Alta Vista Vacations, a boutique travel agency specializing in exceptional honeymoons to the Riviera Maya and the Caribbean. My unique talent lies in matching your honeymoon to your personality, needs and desires, and then taking care of all the details so your only surprises are pleasant ones!

I am a certified specialist in travel to the Riviera Maya, and Cancun and several islands in the Caribbean, including Jamaica and St. Lucia. I am also a certified Sandals and Karisma Resorts expert . This means that I have the expertise to help you find the location and property that would best fulfill your dreams and create a unique honeymoon experience.

Visit My Website |  Like me on Facebook |  Contact Me to Book

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alta vista vacations is a sponsor of the man registry’s groomsadvice blog

Have you thought about honeymoon destinations or activities yet? How are you and your bride sharing the planning duties? Tell us about it in the comments section below.

Looking forward to the honeymoon is often what gets couples through the stress of wedding planning. However the honeymoon can be stressful, too. Check out our ten signs that the post-wedding vacation isn’t going exactly as planned.

10.) Her mom and dad just showed up.

9.) You thought your travel agent booked you tickets to Key West, Florida. You ended up with tickets to Key West, Iowa.

8.) She just changed into her swimsuit. Her legs are harrier than yours.

7.) While helping her unpack, you notice a book in her luggage titled “How to Drug Your New Husband, Rob Him Blind and Leave Him For Dead in the Mexican Desert.”

6.) The “romantic serenade” that the resort advertised is actually just a monkey playing a banjo.

5.) Your cruise director: Gilbert Gottfried

4.) The first thing she did upon arrival was tweet “FML”

3.) Every time she calls the hot Italian maintenance man to the room, she makes you leave to go get her food.

2.) You saved yourselves for marriage… but now she’s telling you she wants to wait for the 5-year anniversary.

1.) You’re already divorced.

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Do you have anything to add to this list? What else would make for a disastrous honeymoon? Let us know in the comments.

Honeymoon golf. Is it allowed?

“Can I hit the links during my honeymoon?” This is probably one of the most common questions we get asked by grooms – and I really can’t blame them for asking. Most couples travel to warm, waterfront locations for their honeymoon – locations with plenty of golf courses nearby. For golfers, it’s only natural to want to get out and test your skill against the local challenges. However, suggesting a golf outing to your new wife can be tricky.

Here are a few things to think about before you book that tee time:

Marriage is, after all, about compromise

We recently polled ten of our Twitter and Facebook friends on the topic and the vote went 9-1 in favor of the groom being allowed to play as long as there was another daytime activity that the bride would want to do solo. We couldn’t agree more with this stance. Making compromises is a huge part of any healthy marriage.

Is she a golfer?

If the answer to this question is yes, you’re in the clear. Try setting up a tee time for the both of you. Most courses will have clubs that can be rented for a small fee. The only negative side to this is that you’re probably going to have to let her win… ahh who am I kidding, she’d probably beat you anyway!

Be smart

If you do happen to find yourself on the golf course, use your brain. While getting to play is a nice addition to the honeymoon, you must remember that it is your honeymoon. Only play nine holes,  don’t get drunk and be home when you say you will be. This is just good ‘ol fashion common sense, guys.

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So what do you think? Should the groom be able to play golf on his honeymoon? Yes? No? Only if the bride is a golfer as well? Let us know in the comments section below.