Who’s Best For Your Best Man?
Your best man is the one guy who you can count on to stand with you when all others will not. He is unwavering in his loyalty to you. That being said he will not stand by and not voice his opinion. He’ll offer the facts, let you know what he thinks and then NO MATTER WHAT you decide he will stand by you. In short, if your life was a zombie film, he’s the guy you want to have watching your back.
Usually you know exactly who your best man will be even before you have asked or even chosen the girl you want to marry. Yup, the bond can be that strong. I knew who my best man would be before I met my wife. We live 3000 kms apart but we’re still tight and chat every chance we get. This is a man I would die for.
He Tells It Like It Is Even If You Don’t Like It
So make sure you have that bond, you know he’ll give you straight up answers without worrying about offending you. Sometimes the thing not said is the worst thing NOT to say. You need to be comfortable with each other. Way back in the day, the best man’s job was to spend the night with the groom the night before his wedding and make sure he didn’t make a run for it. Strange but true. The night before my wedding, my best man and I got a case of beer and sat around reminiscing and writing our speeches. Well, in truth, he wrote his speech, I watched a movie, drank most of the beer and ad-libbed the whole thing the next day. It went surprisingly well.
Best Man Etiquette
Make sure he knows he is YOUR BEST MAN. Ask him to stand by you in private. You can ask the wedding party as a whole, but ask you BM in private. Here are some things that will make him stand apart from the rest of your bridal party:
* Make Him Unique- Have his tie or boutonniere differ from yours AND the wedding party’s so people know he is unto himself.
* Let Him Know His Responsibilities- He’ll be making a speech, so make sure you can count on him for that. He should know not to tell the Mexican hooker story, but some people get caught up in the moment, or the bottle…if you have the bond I mentioned earlier this will not be problem. But he won’t be offended if you run him through some rules you’d like him to follow.
* He’s Your Party Planner- This man will also be the driving force behind your stag party as well. Another good reason to pick a guy who knows you. There is nothing worse than showing up and finding out it’s the old “donkey show” and you went and invited both your dad and the bride to be’s father. Stag parties take on many different faces these days. The strip club trip, while not a thing of the past, is no longer the be all and end all of the stag experience click here for information on Gutsy Groom’s Stag packages. If there is something you REALLY WANT to do, don’t be afraid to ask to work with him on the Stag. Or at least let him know if there is anything you 100 percent do not want.
Always pick a guy you know will stand by you. This may offend or upset other friends but try to incorporate them into the wedding party or the wedding in some other way. Real friends will understand why a certain person will be chosen to be your Best Man. Treat him well, when picking wedding party gifts, get your best man a little something extra. He deserves it.
If he has to travel a long distance and you can swing it, pick up his tux rental, send a kick ass car to get him from the airport or take him out for a great dinner. He came all this way to stand by you so let him know how much that means to you. Always be open to any questions he may have.
I have a lot of friends and I consider myself lucky enough to have quite a few good friends. But guys I would ask to stand by my side on the most important day of my life, well I can count those guys on one hand and I’m sure you can too. It’s pretty bloody overwhelming to be a Best Man if you do it right. And I want every man, standing next to you on that special day to be the Best Man they can be.
Simon Daykin is an award winning event designer, planner and groom stylist with Fire Fly Occasions. Simon strives to get grooms involved in the wedding planning process and have their opinions heard. He understands that grooms can get left out or pushed out of the planning process so he’s here to help. You can connect with him further on Google+.
Tags: The Wedding Party