Popping the Question … Twice
Brian from The Groom Says stops by today with a guest post on popping the big question to that special guy in your life.. The Best Man
You’ve got the best and worst out of the way, haven’t you? You hitchhiked cross-country to ask her parents’ permission. You flew to Serbia to locate the perfect diamond. You booked a private jet for Rome and got down on one knee in front of the Trevi Fountain, tossing three coins into the shallow pool as the local band you’d hired played a broken English version of her favorite song, Clapton’s Wonderful Tonight.
Only your job isn’t quite through. You’ve got one more person to swoon: the person who will surely be finding your socks, ironing your shirt and snapping you back to reality on the morning of your wedding. It’s time to win over the Best Man.
But be relieved. No one’s expecting romance or surprises or fireworks. Your best man won’t be sharing the news with his girlfriends for the next few months, bragging about where and when and how you did it. Still, that doesn’t mean that you (the Groom) shouldn’t put a little thought into it. After all, memorable can be manly.
I decided to pop the question one evening at a local bowling alley (for you Los Angelenos, that would be the Lucky Strike lanes in Hollywood). My Best Man and I would retreat there occasionally, shedding our significant others for some much-needed man time. Pins. Balls. Beer. Billiards. Lebowski one-liners. It’s the perfect refuge, and it was the ideal location for us.
If you’re looking for something less public (or less commercial), consider a day hike, canoe trip or a drive out to your favorite getaway. The key is to put some thought behind it, and when he says, “I knew something was up,” take it as a compliment. He’s glad you care.
Pony Express may have been the preferable method in the mid-1800s, but it was important to this groom to pop the Best Man question in person. And sans fiancee. You might need a month to recover from the engagement — take it. If he’s the right person for the job, he won’t care when it happens. And if you’re a good groom, you’ll avoid the 10-cent text:
hi jim, jerry’s phone died but he totally wants u2b his best man. yes?!?! yay!!! -jess
Why this guy? Do you really trust him to be your go-to guy for the next 12 months plus? Will he be the one who scrapes you off of the bathroom floor the morning after your bachelor party, cleans up your stink and doesn’t judge you at any (mis)step along the way?
Then it’s important to express how he’s the only guy you know who could do this job and do it well. It may not need to happen over the loudspeaker at the local roller rink, but be sure to tell him how pumped you are about the next year, and let him know that he’s the only worthy wing man.
And don’t forget … memorable can be masculine. So throw on some rib-eyes at that campground grill, and then throw on the charm. We won’t tell.
Tags: Best Man Duties